Motherhood Through Loss: Part 2 with Ellan Ruskamp [episode 13]

header graphic for episode 13 motherhood through loss with ellan ruskamp

Listen to Motherhood Through Loss: Part 2 with Ellan Ruskamp on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts

Today’s episode is with a dear friend of mine, Ellan Ruskamp, and we’re talking more on the topic of motherhood through loss. Ellan and I have several mutual connections, and we don’t live very far apart from each other, so it’s been fun to learn more about each other and continue developing our friendship! Ellan and her family reside on their farm in northeast Nebraska, and when she’s not doing the bookkeeping for their operation, you can find her chasing around their 3 boys. She also has her own business, Midwest Marigold, where she creates graphic tees and other apparel that is inspired by the heart and soul of rural life (which has been an incredible creative outlet for her).

We’re talking about the heartbreaking loss of Ellan’s fourth baby, and what this unexpected journey has looked like for her and her family to navigate. Through Ellan’s experience, she’s learned that taking time to work through and process your grief is key, and it should never be on anyone else’s timeline. We also discuss the comfort that comes from being in community with others who have experienced loss, what it can look like to work through loss when you have other children, understanding that your pain will never completely go away, and more.

These last two episodes have covered topics that can feel really hard to talk about, but I’m truly grateful for Ellan (and Kaitlin in the previous episode), for having the courage to share so openly. Understanding that motherhood is never a one-size-fits-all type of thing, and will never look ‘perfect’ (no matter what you see on social media) is so very important. If you’ve experienced loss along your motherhood journey, or even if becoming a mom has been more challenging than you expected, you should never feel guilty for staying true to what YOU need to do in order to heal and thrive!

Ellan Ruskamp is a farm wife & boy mama from rural Nebraska. When she’s not chasing kiddos or helping out on the farm, she enjoys getting in touch with her creative side through her business, Midwest Marigold. With Midwest Marigold, she designs apparel inspired by the heart & soul of rural life that leave women feeling full of confidence and beautiful in everyday life!

In this episode, motherhood through loss (part 2), we cover: 

  • Ellan’s heartbreaking loss of her fourth baby in April 2023, which has been a journey she never thought she would have to navigate
  • Taking time to sit with your feelings and truly process through your grief
  • Focusing on what YOU need after experiencing a loss, and staying true to that
  • Finding comfort in talking with and being in community with others who have experienced loss
  • Talking with your other children and helping them process/work through loss
  • Understanding that the pain of your loss will never completely go away, but you do have the ability to hold space for multiple emotions at once
  • Reminding yourself that motherhood is never a perfect journey, and there’s never just one way to mother/parent

Resources & Links:

Connect with Ellan: 

  • Follow on Instagram
  • Check out her website 
  • Email Ellan at

Connect with Amanda:

Related Episodes: 

More about The Busy Farm Mom podcast: 

Are you always questioning if you’re a good enough mom? Are you confused on what nutritional options are best for your family to be healthy and nourished? Are you burning the candle at both ends and feeling desperate to find ways to take better care of your family & your own wellness?  

Welcome to The Busy Farm Mom! The podcast where we deep dive to answer these questions and so much more! Tune in for conversations with me, your host, Amanda, as we come together in this space to relate to one another & all the facets of being a busy farm mom. 

We will discuss topics such as navigating motherhood, deciphering food choices, holistic wellness, and how agriculture ties into all of it. Think of this podcast as a community for farm moms, to chat about all the decisions we make to care for our families. We are in this together! 

My goal of this podcast is to relate to so many of you when you don’t feel like you’re enough. I want you to walk away feeling equipped, confident, and joyful about your role as a busy farm mom so that you can thrive, and therefore, your family can thrive, too. 

We can gather around as friends in this space, while being in our most chaotic stages of life, whether you’re chasing your toddler, preparing endless amounts of meals for your family, driving to work, or running the grain cart. This space is an opportunity to grow and learn simple tips from me & so many special guests on ways we tackle that doubt of “are we a good enough mom?” Kick that thought out of your mind and come join our judgment free zone, where we will never question that you’re doing a great job mama!

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